In the last ten years, I’ve had probably hundreds of conversations with people who are not addicts. In the recovery world we’ve called these people “normies”, which I’m not a huge fan of. Actually I don’t like that term at all, but I suppose the term came from a person’s “normal” response to alcohol. And not having the physical allergy to ALWAYS take it over board.
Regardless, I’m not a fan of the word “Normie”.
So in these conversations I’ve had with non addicts, there seems to be a few common assumptions made about me. (People in recovery) almost always there’s an assumption that they shouldn’t drink around me. That I may somehow get tempted, that I don’t go out for “drinks”. Which is not true.
Actually, earlier in my recovery when I was younger, I would go out to shows... sometimes 3-4 times a week (living in Austin made this possible), and I usually always go with a group of sober friends and we would have a blast. We actually even made a game of it. We would count how many times people would ask us for drugs and compare at the end of the night.
In a weird dark way, it was almost like a compliment to be asked for drugs at a show. Because you always go ask the person who seems like they are having the most fun (high AF) and it’s funny because we were actually sober AF.
Another common assumption I would get is that my life is probably pretty boring. All though as I’ve gotten older, I’m finding more comfort in going to bed early, and other “boring” things... but I feel like I’m just maturing and my definition of “fun” might be changing.
But I live a far from boring life. I mean my career alone has me doing all sorts of crazy fun things. Whether that’s travling, having intense meetings, being at confrences, soooo many amazing things. And in my personal life I love attending events...usually health/athletic events.
Another assumption people make about my recovery is that maybe I just stopped doing the hard stuff (coke, meth, opiates, xtc etc.) and that I should totally be fine with drinking. Or maybe it was just a phase because I was so young... that I should probably be fine to smoke a joint by now. The work I’ve done on myself and the truth I’ve found out about myself is that I dont feel the NEED to put any mind altering substance in my body. This last time I got sober I reviewed all my relapses and they always started with alcohol, and before I knew it I’d be off somewhere smoking crack with strangers. So I tend to stick to my truth about my reaction to any mind altering substance. But I will not speak for anyone else, this is just my truth.
And on another note, I just dont feel like taking/drinking will enhance my life in anyway. If anything, I feel like it would hinder me or hold me back. I’ve tapped into an infinite inner resource of power [aka “God”] and I feel so free and abundance with life that I don’t feel a NEED to change my state of mind. Which is quite the opposite of how I felt in my addiction. In my addiction, I NEEDED to alter my state of mind in order to deal with life, I don’t have to do that anymore and it’s the most free I’ve ever felt.